


Where's My Supersuit?

by westiec



Series: Pepperony at Home [3]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Everyone lives, Gen, Humor, Tony Stark's youthful mistakes, Tumblr Prompt, but also post them fixing it, post-IW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 09:55:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15883704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westiec/pseuds/westiec
Summary: Tony's still indignant Rhodey stole his suit. No, not that one.





	Where's My Supersuit?

**Author's Note:**

> Concept from [this tumblr post](http://allofthefeelings.tumblr.com/post/177594768700/concept-tony-and-rhodey-talking-about-that-time):
> 
> _Tony and Rhodey, talking about “that time they fought over the suit,” and it gradually becomes clear that they are not referring to the events of Iron Man 2, but rather a gaudy hot rod-red tuxedo that Rhodey worked with Jarvis to remove from Tony’s wardrobe at any means necessary, which at one point included stun guns._
> 
>  
> 
> Title is, of course, an _Incredibles_ reference.

It had been a long, tiring day, and this was the last thing Pepper needed.

She heard raised voices when she stepped off the elevator to the penthouse, and braced herself to end whatever argument was happening in her living room. Sure enough, as she walked in, Rhodey was shaking his head while Tony paced and ranted.

“...and then you just stole my suit! You came into my house and stole my suit, against my express wishes,” Tony shouted, arms flung wide.

Rhodey crossed his arms and stared at him. “Tony, we’ve been through this a thousand times. You were in no state of mind to be making rational decisions about that suit,” he countered. “That whole fight got way out of hand, I'll admit, but I was trying to help you. What were you even thinking?”

“Well, he was dying,” Pepper put in, with rather more magnanimity than she had been able to muster when she'd first learned that little detail during the disaster at the Stark Expo. Spending time in the Soul Dimension did that to a person. Or maybe all the other near-death experiences they'd dodged since then. Perspective, she supposed.

Rhodey turned and looked at her like she had grown a second head. Tony, on the other hand, looked triumphant, jabbing a finger into his best friend's chest to emphasize his words. “See? She wasn't even _there_ and she knows how much your betrayal hurt! This is why she's my favorite.”

“I'm your favorite because I run your company, keep you from dealing with the press, and have never, ever lied to you,” she replied. Tony raised a finger like he had a point to add, and she suppressed a grin. “Yes, and also because I do that thing you like in bed. But what do you mean I wasn't there? I definitely remember you two tearing up the house after that disaster of a birthday party and Rhodey taking the War Machine suit.”

Now Tony was the one looking confused, while a slow grin spread over Rhodey’s face. “Oh no,” he answered smugly, “that's not the suit we're talking about. This goes back before you started working for him. And I know you - you'd have _never_ let him go out in public in this number. Y'know our boy's favorite color?”

His favorite… no. She'd known Tony had some… interesting fashion moments in his younger days, but surely even he hadn't… “Tell me he did not own a hot rod red suit,” she pleaded.

“No, I owned a hot rod red _tuxedo_ , thank you very much, until a certain _somebody_ \- ” he shot a glare at the ceiling “ - decided that Colonel Chinos here - ”

“It was Captain then, Sir, if I may interrupt,” JARVIS interjected. Tony's glare softened at the sound of his voice, and Pepper smiled. When everything was over with Thanos, Vision had appeared one day with a string of Wakandan kimoyo beads, explaining that whatever Shuri had done to the matrix holding the Mind Stone in place had also shaken loose the code that comprised Tony's old friend and confidant. It was an unexpected gift to have him back.

“ _Captain_ Chinos then, my mistake,” he said with an exasperated eyeroll and a fond smile, “not even a full bird fashion failure, and you decided to team up with him and undermine my sartorial genius!”

“Ain’t nothing wrong with business casual, and I don't need to be a sartorial genius to know that suit was a disaster,” Rhodey insisted. “Worse than a disaster, Tony, that tuxedo was a travesty! An offense to innocent eyeballs and honest tailors everywhere, and you wouldn't see reason! We had to save you from yourself.”

“You ‘saved me,’” oh, now he was doing finger quotes, “by using JARVIS’s security stun guns to knock me out while you destroyed a brilliant specimen of haute couture in my own lab incinerator! That suit was custom made! One of a kind! Irreplaceable!”

“And thank god for that,” muttered Rhodey, utterly unapologetic. “Tell you what, Tones, your lady love never saw it, and I know you're not about to argue with her sense of style. I bet JARVIS has some old images stored - can you throw up a visual for us, J?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” the AI admitted, sounding even more drily amused than usual. “My archive protocols maintain records of all manner of Sir's horrifying life choices. Ms. Potts, I must apologize for what you're about to see.”

It wasn't just an image. JARVIS, bless him, apparently had a video clip of Tony preening in front of a mirror while wearing the single most atrocious outfit Pepper had ever laid eyes on. They all stared at the projection, gobsmacked.

Tony blinked first. “That's… honestly worse than I remembered.”

“It's worse than _I remembered_ , and I burned it the first time,” Rhodey said, shaking his head.

“Is that a _gold lamé_ shirt underneath?” she whispered in gleeful horror as the Tony in the video made kissy faces at his reflection.

“That… yes, yes it is. Look, in my defense -” he began, before trailing off, mouth and hands moving helplessly.

Pepper shook her head, laughing. “No, Tony. There's no defending that. That tux was a crime against fashion and decency. JARVIS and Rhodey did you a favor, and you ought to thank them.”

JARVIS froze the video on a frame of Tony shooting a wink and finger guns into the camera. Rhodey laughed, and Tony looked stricken, his eyes darting between the image, Pepper, and Rhodey, before closing in resignation and accepting his defeat.

“JARVIS, please save that video clip to my personal library,” she said, earning a betrayed look from Tony and a cackle from Rhodey.

It had been a long, tiring day, and this was exactly what Pepper needed.

**Author's Note:**

> Hell yes, in my universe they get JARVIS back. FRIDAY discovered she loves running the Avengers training compound upstate, so JARVIS can resume running the Tower and Tony's personal workshop. Tony calls this "work-life separation." Pepper laughed for 20 minutes straight when he said it.


End file.
